Transitions

At dinner on Saturday night in the Antelope Valley, J reminded me that I haven't been posting much lately. Yes, I agreed. I am not entirely sure why but I have been in a bit of a funk lately. I will be transitioning to a new library next month, so part of my time has been going through the Civil Service process--testing and interviews to do that and the rest of the time has been spent wrapping my head around the coming transition. Don't get me wrong, I am ambitious and I pursued the promotion. It is a brand new spanking library that I have the opportunity to get on the ground floor of how things are done. No coming in to "this is how we do this at this library". Setting up the library is a fantastic professional development opportunity that is not lost on me. All those building built in the 70's had a shelf life of 30-40 years so this is a valuable piece to have in my professional tool box.
Nevertheless, I have had to get my head wrapped around it all. This will be my 5th library in less than 4 years. I am comfortable with the known. I am getting to know my community and I like them--well most of them. I enjoy not commuting. I can walk to work if I want to and sometimes I do--when the ole heel isn't giving me hell.
Here is my main concern. I have never been at one job for more than 4 years at any one time EVER! I have left and returned to almost all of my jobs. I guess that says something good, but what else does that say. I get bored and feel the need to go do something else, get bored and go back to what the now new old position. Wash and repeat. Hmmm. I am concerned that I am at a point in my life when I need to think about stability and the future. Retirement is usually contingent on staying in a position long enough to build it up. Since I have moved up so quickly with the County--and I am grateful, I don't have much further to go. My concern is that I still haven't had the chance to see if I have stick to it power. Also, I am quickly realizing that all this moving that I have done most of my life--I am convinced that I am part Gypsy--has a financial strain. While living abroad, I took to carrying a spatula with me because I had bought so many during my years of being in and out of Japan that I had probably spent somewhere in the neighborhood of $50-70 (pre 99cent and 100 Yen stores) on this very inexpensive necessity. I got tired of getting rid of and re-buying so many things that are just not valuable enough to take but nevertheless needed. For some reason I drew a line with spatulas and started packing one in my suitcase.

My brother Dave and I were talking on the phone this weekend. He doesn't like change--he moved to Stillwater for college and never left except for a brief disastrous go at living in Dallas. Me, I can't seem to keep the same hair color for more than 3 months. Maybe Pop was right all those years and he wasn't my father but a policeman dropped me off at the door. But then again, he was a trucker and traveled all the US Highways. When I road trip I think about him. I am a cross between him and my mom. I love being in the car for hours, just watching the scenery go by. I have a destination in mind. I push myself onward like my father. But I also see all the interesting things along the way and want to stop. So during my two road trips, I have accommodated both styles. One the way out, I push ahead. The long road in front of me. My thoughts drifting in a Zen like experience with the gradually transitioning landscape hour after hour across country to my destination. My return trip is seeing all the pretties that I noticed on the way--the stop at the museum, the overnight in a destination.
Change is on the way for me. Will this be the last one for a while? No, I have to move in March. Maybe, I will be able to test my mettle in this next move. See if I have staying power. Time will tell. With the change of weather and the change of season, I have regained my purpose and am now embracing the upcoming transition. More posts soon.