Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Betrayed

Six a.m. last Monday morning my world was normal. At 6:15 it seemed to have turned upside down. I opened my eyes, the room shifted. Thinking that was strange but not pondering very long, I stood up only to have the world go weeble wobble on me. I fell back into bed. This was the first time in 12 years that I felt the need to call in sick. I didn't on Monday, I hadn't used my health insurance and needed to get it squared away first. All day, my world was fuzzy around the edges. I dreaded going to sleep that night. Tuesday, I was no better. I took myself to urgent care. Tests later it seemed that I had high blood pressure and a UTI. Lovely. And by the way I started my period while waiting at Urgent Care. I received two prescriptions. The first an antibiotic to knock out the infection--warning--may cause dizziness--the other a mild dose of high blood pressure--warning--may cause dizziness. I wonder how I am to determine where my source of dizziness comes from--that was my major complaint in the first place. With presciptions in hand, I left for my old library which was nearby.

I went to the library to checked out DVD's because I realized that I would need to take it easy for the next little while and guess who gave up her cable and internet? Betrayed!

I feel that my body has betrayed me. Finally things seems to be clicking into place and now it decides to play primadonna on me. But then my body has reminded me that really I need to ask who has betrayed who here. Who has talked herself out of countless runs? Who has rationalized Little Ceasar's Pizza? Who has eaten too much and not exercised enough? Who added 30 pounds to my body? Who exactly? Well, me.

I have returned to the doctor with blood pressure in normal ranges. I think I need to use this chance to right some of the wrongs I have been asking my body to endure. I need this vehicle I call my body to continue to work for a number of years in the future. Only time will tell. But I am hoping for the best.

1 comment:

Karen said...

How are you feeling now? Have you noticed any changes since you've been taking the medicine?