Hope

Yesterday, October 30, 20114, marked 10 years since my classmates and I escaped from a devastating flash flood.  In the aftermath, the university arranged for a grief counsellor to visit the class.  The counsellor told us to focus on the fact that we survived, we were library students and to seek ways to accomplish the greater good we were spared for.  I don't dwell on the flood very often and I go weeks without thinking about it, but it is always in the back on my mind.  In April, the only significant rain fall we had was one that dropped 5 inches.  On that day, at one point, I found myself fixating on the rain.  I both mentally and physically shook myself, reminded myself that I lived on the second floor and then hopped in the shower to take my mind off the weather.  Periodically, I remember the words of wisdom uttered to help us reframe the situation.  These words remind me that I have the tools to give more meaning to other lives and at times change them.
In the past week, two potential pathways forward, have presented themselves.  I could say that next week I will start down a diverging road, but in reality I believe that the split has been there for some time.  I had been just stagnating at the split, unable to move forward on the road that this life, here and now is on and somewhat too trepidatious to embark on the unknown path.  In the past several weeks, I have decided to embrace the unknown and set myself down that path.  Now another split has presented itself.  Both possibilities are ones that I want for myself.  I find it amazing that the first challenge for both come on Wednesday, November 5.  The first I present myself for at 3:30 and the second at 5:45--I am grateful for daylight savings time--otherwise, I might have needed to choose one over the other.  Events are lining up which confirms my belief that if I think positive and start working toward a direction then, possibilities will present themselves.  Sometimes, the path I choose is one that presented itself unexpectedly.  But I have always been able to connect that path to the focus and energy spent working for the change.